The Truth About Why We Date Online

Look at Yourself First
When people end up at online dating sites looking for love, there are certain things we know, but we don’t want to admit to ourselves. That’s the biggest problem, though. You see, before we can even think about finding love online we need to do one thing first. So before you can start putting your heart on your sleeve for all to see, take some much needed advice… Be honest with yourself. Without this basic avenue of honesty, how can we expect to be honest with anyone else?

The fear of what others will think plays a big factor in what we tell ourselves. Fear of rejection, fear of happiness, fear of success-you name it, it shapes our honesty-or dishonesty-with ourselves. So, the first thing to do is man up (sorry girls) and talk about things with our inner selves and find out where we are in life and inside our minds. We all have out skeletons in our closets, but if we expect to get ahead in anything, we must confront those skeletons. That means maybe bringing up some things that we don’t want to.

Weeding Out the Past & The Skeletons
This can be-and is-a scary situation for most, as there are certainly things we have all done that we would rather forget about. And for the most part, we id forget-that’s why we have problems today! Have there been times where you feel like something is wrong, but you can’t quite put your finger on what it is? Well, let me tell you something. That is your conscious nagging at you. It’s telling you that there is something that needs fixing. And it won’t stop until you do.

But being honest with ourselves means that we are going to have to dig as deep as we can and uncover some truths that we would rather die than admit. Yes, I mean that. I have done it, and it has made me a better person because of it. Not only did I drop a whole bunch of extra emotional baggage, I was able to admit a few things and in doing so, clear my conscious. I no longer feel as if I have to hide form the world-and most of all I don’t have to hide from myself. That is a great feeling, let me tell you. So ask your self the following question and be really honest but be warned! The answer may surprise-and offend–you…

Q: What Are We Really Here?

A: Because we are desperate! Desperate for love and attention and companionship and we just can’t seem to find it anywhere else, that’s why. See? I told you that you would be surprised-or maybe offended even… Was I lying to you? Never!

This is one of the biggest things many people take offense to when I write it. That is because if those who are foraying into the world of online dating for the first time, most of them do it becausethey can’t find anyone through other channels-meaning they are here already out of desperation.

So please, we all know you can’t find anyone on the online dating sites-neither can the rest of us-so get over it and get over yourself and move on.

The Truth Really Does Hurt
I know it sounds harsh, that’s because it is harsh! But sometimes we need to hear the truth once in a while to jump start out heads and minds working again. You see, when us women are starved for love and attention, we tend to throw the rules of the road out the window in hopes it will help us find what we came here looking for. Unfortunately, however, that is not the case. In fact, doing so will repel the only chances we might have at finding love.

When you finally finish reading this, think about what is written here. Instead of taking it as an attack on you personally, or an attack on your intentions-or the goodness in your heart, ask yourself how true it really is. Because for some of us, this is the jump start we need to be completely honest with ourselves. To have the truth shoved in our faces, well, yes it’s hard hitting, but it works. And because it worked for many before I wrote this, it will work for many more after you read this. And I will keep writing and reiterating this until there is no one else in the world who can benifit from it.

But when you really think about it, you will understand that it is not in any way meant to hurt you. It is meant only as an eye opener, and that’s all. Once you can open your eyes to your inner self and the inner truth, then-and only then-can you be truly free to pursue anything you want. And that, I think, is the one and only reason for all or any of it. The only reason to do anything we do.