Of Course There’s a Difference-Never Believe What You Hear

I am probably going to get killed for writing this. This are some very powerful words I’ve got here. This is a seven part series on the most unknown secrets of women. And they are not just any secrets, either. They are the secrets about women that most of us women don’t want any man to ever know about.

So why am I posting them? Because I am loyal to my readers as my readers are loyal to me. It’s that simple. Respect for the people I say. And I wouldn’t have it any other way. So read on, follow the advice given here and go on to a successful life in dating. That is of course until you find the right one…

-Especially When Women Say It While Dating
I know I’ve said it in earlier posts, but this is probably the biggest secret of them all. While women may say many things, while they may be hurtful or loving, or anywhere in between, it is a good thing to keep in mind that women don’t always mean what they say.

One of the biggest things for men to know if they want to be successful with women from early on? Never listen to them. Well, no-that’s not entirely true. Of course you have to listen to them. But while you are listening to them watch them and what they do while they are talking to you. What are women doing while they are talking to you Just because women say something with their mouths does NOT mean they actually mean it. And the one true way to tell is you watch them say it with their bodies as well… and at the same time!

Body language is one of the most important aspects to a relationship. You don’t have to be a trained psychologist to know that, but it takes a hell of an intelligent man to remember it when faced with an in-depth conversation with the beautiful lady standing in front of him. The first reaction any man will have is to respond to what that woman is saying to him with her mouth. That’s because he is usually focused on something OTHER than what she is doing. He is not paying attention to her body language, rather he is most likely paying attention to the prettier parts, if you catch my meaning.

And please, guys, in no way am I hinting that men are dogs and only care about one thing-absolutely not. What I am saying, however, is this: While it is perfectly OK to watch whatever part of the women that makes you happy, you will get the most benefit from watching to see if the way she acts matches the way she speaks-and coincide with her words in particular.

A Perfect Example

Take for example, a woman sitting having a drink at a bar. She catches your eye and you lock gazes for a second, making direct eye contact. Of course, any guy knows that is the first sign a woman may be interested in you, right? Of course it is. So, you go over to her and strike up a conversation. But for whatever reason, she doesn’t think you are right for her. So, she starts going with her the script of getting rid of you. You, on the other hand have no idea what’s coming and proceed with the usual lines. You ask if you can buy her a drink. She doesn’t want you to think she’s cold, either that or she feels bad for making you to come over, wasting your time in the first place, so she kindly accepts with no real intentions of going any further. The problem is, however, you think everything is fine, when she is silently telling you to go away.

Then you start talking and try to get her number. You figure what have you got to lose? She wanted you to come over and talk o her and she accepted the drink, so something’s got to give, right? Not necessarily. She does in fact give you what you want, that being a phone number with the promise to go out real soon. And she then promptly leaves. “Score!” You think as you go back to doing what you were doing before you met her.

What Really Happened
That was not a score, as you soon find out. When you call later on, or the next day, you find the number was bogus and she lied to you. Now you are feeling taken advantage of, angry and hurt all at the same time. You see, this all could have been avoided if you would have watched her body language instead of listening intently on what she was saying with her mouth. I know, a complete contradiction on any other piece of advice I have ever given about “Listen to your woman” but in this case, NOT listening is a necessary evil. Let me tell you why…

You see, the whole time the woman you were listening to was talking, she was saying something completely different than you thought she was saying. No, you heard her words right, but you didn’t hear her body right. As a matter of fact, you just down right ignored what her body was saying because you finally got someone to let you buy her a drink AND give you her number.

I guarantee that if you would have tried to listen to what her body language was saying, you would have been able to save yourself quite a bit of time… And some money in the long run on that drink(s) you bought her. You see, when you were walking over to her, you probably didn’t notice that she was probably trying to look away from you, or maybe she was fidgeting in her seat like she was nervous that you were going to her. She probably looked around the whole place too, as if she was scanning for something. Well, she was. In fact, she was scanning for the nearest exit and was nervous about it the whole time.

You see, when the two of you locked gazes, it was by mistake. She didn’t mean to. Think of it as “the deer in headlights” syndrome. What happens is when a woman is looking around a room at nothing in particular, she will scan it, just as she was when you walked over to her, and will unfortunately sometimes get caught in an unintentional direct eye contact moment. Why does she keep looking, you ask? It’s simple, really. She was caught off guard that someone was actually looking back, that she didn’t know what to do! Either that, or she was just trying to be nice and smile, but it lasted longer than intended-and in a case like that, the direct gaze of the eye contact IS unintentional. It is just meant to happen for a split second with a bit of a smile so as to not be rude to someone. It is not meant as a “Come over here and talk to me” look at all. The problem is, the guys that happen to get caught up in these types of looks don’t know that or don’t see the difference.

So Now You Know-What Are You Going To Do With The Knowledge?
That’s the big question… Now you know this secret, what are you going to do with the information in the future? May I make a suggestion? Use it to your advantage. It will do all of us some good. And it might just save some awkward moments and hurt feelings in he end. Think about this… One night, you do the same thing, but this time, you are listening to the body language she is presenting too. So when you finally get to her, you take into account the fact you understand it may have been an accident and you bring it up. Not in an overly direct way, as if you are trying to say she did it on purpose. No- instead, ask her if it was her intention for you to come talk to her. Just a simple little question such as this, can make a world of difference in the way someone’s night goes.

And you never know. Maybe bringing it up will show her that you are not insensitive to the feelings of women. That in itself might just get you her number anyway. It’s worth a shot, so try it the next time you are out. It certainly won’t hurt anyone and you can’t lose any more than you already have in the past, so why not?